Bad Rex

Rex is a good guy at heart. Don't immediately judge him as "mean" just because he made a random two year old cry. It was all innocent at first, and you can't really control how people are going to react to your generosity. "No good deed goes unpunished" and all that jazz, you know?

Rex and I were at Meijer with our friends Jake and Kaitlin. Actually, I had planned on going to Meijer alone, but Rex surprised me by arranging for Jake and Kaitlin to come to town and hang out with us for the day (See? He's actually a really good guy). So my mundane grocery list was thrown out in favor of "ice cream and sundae toppings" so that we could have a fun night with our friends.

With the appropriate items secured, the four of us were on our way out of the store. On our way out, we spotted a two year old boy trying to ride the mechanical horse. His sister (about five or six years old) stood idly by as he tried to gallop on a stationary horse. It looked equal parts ridiculous and pathetic. Rex pulled a penny out of his pocket and said, "we should give this to him so that he can put it into the machine and make the horse move." Then he started putting it away, saying "Nah...I don't want to freak him out or anything."

Jake grabbed the penny out of Rex's hand and decided that the pint-sized cowboy did indeed need a moving horse. He handed the penny to the sister, and we turned to walk away. The sister put the penny into the slot....the horse began to move....

...and the boy burst into tears.

We're not talking about a lone tear that spilled out of his watery eyes. We're talking "Ahhhhhh! AHHHHHHHHH! WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!" as he jumped off of the horse. He acted as if it just said it was going to run him over. He was sobbing and screaming. His mom rushed out of the grocery line to see what was wrong. The sister started explaining and then pointed to us, at which point we hurried out of the store and into the sanctuary of the car. I hope the poor little boy doesn't grow up to need therapy or anything because of that experience. I can see it now: "Well Doctor, it all started when I was two. I was the victim of a horse attack. I remember...it was running and running, but it seemed as if we were going nowhere. There was a man in blaze orange who was trying to kill me...I've never really been able to forget it completely."

Well, THAT will teach Rex to try to be nice to small children. Never again.