Dog Mania

Usually when I come home from school, I'm greeted by an adorable beagle named Elvis who bounds up to the door and gives me a "welcome home" kiss.  Yesterday, I walked through the door and was bombarded by FOUR dogs.  FOUR.  I was almost knocked over.  Allow me to introduce them:

This is Elvis.  You know him.  He's cute; he's lovable.  He likes to play and to sniff things.

This is Chewy.  His cuteness and lovableness is debatable.  I happen to think he's awesome, but Rex hates him.  We're fostering him for the Southern Nevada Pug Rescue.  I have to make a description of him to go on the SNPR website, and Rex wants him to get adopted NOW so this is the description he wrote: "This pug poops out money, loves to clean your house, and will do your taxes."  Ha ha ha!  Anyway, Rex hates him because he says he's "whiny."  I say that this pug has been through a lot in his tiny life, and we should just be thankful that he's friendly with our other dogs and hasn't pooped or peed in the house once!  What more can you ask for in a dog?  Anyway, I love him.  I hope he doesn't get adopted for a while.

These are Danny and Annie.  They're little wiener dogs that we're taking care of while our friends JB and Amy are out of town.  They are the most chill dogs you will ever meet.  They pretty much sit on the couch all day and watch Elvis and Chewy run around like crazy psycho dogs.  Danny has a special blanket that he curls up in on the couch, and he buries himself so deeply into the blanket that you wouldn't even know he was there.  I'm a little terrified that I am going to forget about him and just plop down on the couch one day and squish him.

This is Elsie.  She's not a dog.  She hates all dogs.  I think she's wondering why Rex and I are torturing her with all of these canines. I'm pretty sure she's trying to ship herself away to a new family in this picture. Sorry, Els!  We love you!

And THIS, my friends, is the layout of our apartment:

I bet you're thinking to yourself, "Gee willakers, Christine, how do you fit four dogs and a cat into that tiny apartment?!"  Well, I'll tell you:  It's not easy.  There's fur everywhere!  I'm always stepping on something alive!  This is even worse than two summers ago when we had eight rats (http://www.webbnewlyweds.blogspot.com/2010/07/day-66.html), because at least rats are little.  I mean, if I got really sick of them I could have thrown all eight of them in the dishwasher and let them crawl around for a while so that I could have some peace.  (I didn't do that, by the way, but the point is that I COULD have.)  I can't do that with these crazy animals.  There are TOO MANY OF THEM.  I'm going nuts.  Rex tried to sit down to watch a movie today, and this is what instantly happened:

Please notice that Rex is not smiling.  That's mostly because guess which dog loves him the most??  CHEWY. Chewy is always crawling on Rex and falling asleep on his chest.   Then he snores his adorable pug snore right in Rex's face, and Rex starts looking more and more annoyed.....but he doesn't have the heart to shove the little sleeping thing off of him.  Awwww...

Every once in a while I come across a situation in life that makes me take a step back and think, "Whoa, how did I get myself into this?!"  This is definitely one of those situations.  It's fun, but it's craziness.  Have you ever tried to walk four dogs at once?  In the movies, they make it look like this:

That's really funny, lady.  Are those dogs even REAL?  I bet they're dead and you just set them up for the picture so you look like a good dog owner.  Let me tell you the real story, reader:  when you try to walk four dogs at once, they try to go in four different directions.  Somehow, while they're going in four different directions, they get their leashes tied up in intricate knots that would take an experienced boyscout to untangle.  All the while, they're tugging at your arms with all their tiny strengths as if to say, "Come this way!" "No, come THIS way!"  It's exhausting.  And then heaven forbid one of them poops - try to hold four leashes AND pick up poop.  Go ahead - try it.  Tell me how that works out for you.  Walking these dogs is definitely a two person job, which is fun because I get time with Rex.....but we had plenty of fun just walking our one dog.  This is getting a little nuts.

Oh, and Rex's friend Steven needs us to watch his Labradoodle on Tuesday.  For the past few years I've thought about volunteering at a dog shelter, but I never wanted to run one out of my one bedroom apartment!!  Our neighbors are going to hate us.  Maybe we should just move out and leave the apartment to the dogs.